“Hello Atlas, it’s me Justice."
“Yes, I know. So can you get us that?”
“Huh?”
“Justice, can you get us Justice?”
Justice laughed saying “oh, well I have got a date set to present our case to the United Nations. July fourth, fitting don’t you think? Anyway, I think you have a good chance of convincing them. But, well there is still the question of how animal independence would work. Your communication and entrepreneurial ability are unquestionable. But the questions of how to apply this to other animals will still be raised.
Atlas said angrily “such a double standard. For the rights of homo sapien sapiens depends not even slightly on communication or entrepreneurial ability. But suddenly for any other species it becomes the most relevant factor. Not very just, if you ask me.”
“I agree with you. But, double standard or not, that will be our main hurdle for independence. And we must establish a baseline of independence before we can even hope to see justice. As any African American will tell you. Today, Juneteenth was only the day they were made independent, and they are still fighting for justice. So we are going to have to figure out how to address those questions”-
Atlas interrupted “I know of plenty of intelligent self sufficient non-human, animal entrepreneurs.”
Justice was surprised “Wait, really? You do?” That’s great!”
Atlas nodded saying “yeah, unfortunately they like to remain under the radar. Who can blame them really?”
Justice said “Yeah, but I mean if there was any way you could convince them to take a chance and show up, they might not have to anymore.”
Atlas relented “I will do what I can.”
Justice said “great, I’ll keep you informed. Oh and”-
Atlas interrupted “DJ Smokey is fine, him and his friends love it here.”
"Great, glad to hear it. I hope he's not too much trouble. He's a good kid, but I still find him a bit insufferable sometimes. God, I sound terrible, but you know? I mean I love him, it's just sometimes like, god damn, ya know?"
Atlas says “oh believe me, I get it.”
“Yeah, I figured you would, anyway, tell him I said hi and we’ll talk soon, bye bye now.”
“Good bye Justice, and, in case I don’t say it enough, thank you.” As Atlas pressed the button again, back to rolling his eyes at the laughter and splashing below the fan sounds of the hovercrafts. Atlas called “Alfa Ape, see about getting the plane ready, we have some traveling to do.”
As Atlas walks around the spiral trail of his mountain, the Stoner Kidz jump off hovercrafts and swim in the ocean around the plants. DJ Flower lays on one of the hovercrafts, knees up, mirror on his neck, sunbathing as he hits a joint. DJ Smokey and MC Bud Buddy hit a large beach ball back and forth over some plants as they swim in the ocean. MC Hippy just splashes around, trying to swim as deep down as he can, but coming up before even half way. As he does, he notices a small rock island off to the side. A large rock from it rolls open, as a large flying boat sails out. He points, "Hey look guys. What the hell is that?" They all turn their heads, eyes widening, as something resembling the Spruce Goose keeps rolling out, seemingly going on forever. DJ Flower gets concerned, "Oh no! Is this something we have to worry about? Oh god, no!" as he crosses himself. DJ Smokey says, "Let's go see," as he, Bud Buddy, and MC Hippy swim to the hovercraft DJ Flower sunbathes on. DJ Flower struggles up saying, "WHAT? No, what if it's"—He is cut off by lack of listening as the rest of the Stoner Kidz climb on the hovercraft and MC Hippy pulls the throttle towards the island. DJ Flower mutters, "Oh lord, forgive them for not listening to me. And forgive me, for I might kill them all," as he crosses himself. As they get over to the plane they stare in awe, as it finally stops moving. "Oh my god that's gotta be like two hundred feet long!" MC Hippy said.
“Yeah and look at those wings. Bet we could play football on them!”
“Actually it’s two hundred and eighteen feet long. And the wingspan, larger than most regulation Gridiron Football Fields!” Atlas said as he approached on a hovercraft driven by Alfa Ape, Charlie Chimp behind him. As the hovercraft stopped. The Stoner Kidz asked in confusion “what is this?” Atlas smirked and said “this is my Birch Bitch!” As he stepped off the hovercraft. Followed by Alfa Ape rolling a suitcase to the plane, and Charlie Chimp walking to check the wings and engines. Atlas looked at the Stoner Kidz and said “you comin?”
They looked at each other confused. MC Hippy looked forward and asked “comin where?”
Atlas just barked without looking back “The Commonwealth of Australia. Gotta go see King Kangaroo in his boxing club. And might as well talk with the Crocs on the way there.” The Stoner Kidz, still confused, not understanding, just smiled and ran after ‘em. Except DJ Flower who asked “wait, King Kangaroo? Boxing club? Crocs? And speakin a crocs, what about our clothes?” Atlas said “what do you think is in the suitcase? I knew y’all would wanna come, so I accounted for it.” He then looked over to Charlie Chimp spinning a propeller and asked “we bout ready Charlie?” Charlie nodded giving a thumbs up as he climbed into the cockpit high above the ground. As Alfa Ape, and Atlas climbed into the plane through the large ground opening on the back. Followed by the excited Stoner Kidz, and reluctant DJ Flower, crossing himself, muttering prayers. Once on the floor folded up and latched closed, they sat on side chairs, as the propellers spun to life, the flying boat sailed faster and faster, until rising higher and higher, finally flying!
DJ Smokey says “what?” His mouth full of bread, as he continues chewing and speaking “I got the munchies.”
MC Hippy says “we all got the munchies but you can’t just”-
Atlas interrupts “take whatever you want. We got a long flight. And if you want to watch TV, the control panel for it is right over there” as he moves his nose to a canvas sack with a tablet in it. He then continues “just please try and keep it down. I’m gonna try and get some sleep.” As he slips his head onto some earmuffs and a sleeping mask, circles around a soft bed, scratches at it a few times, then lays down, curled into himself. The Stoner Kidz immediately get up and grab plates filling them. As DJ Smokey walks over and grabs the tablet. Clicking buttons labeled TV ON. As a large screen rolls down from in front, and the tablet screen becomes a selection page of every streaming service that Smokey knows of and even a few he has never heard of before.
The Stoner Kidz laughed and cheered “HOA!” As Saitama punched a large three headed monster tearing its body in half, on screen. “He is OP as fuck!” MC Hippy says.
“Oh no! OP doesn’t even begin to cover it!” MC Bud Buddy said.
DJ Smokey jumped in “oh yeah, I’m pretty sure he could take god! Huh? DJ Flower? Huh? What do you think would happen if Caped Baldy punched god?”
DJ Flower shook his head saying seriously, "That's not funny!" as the laughter of the rest of the Stoner Kidz faded. Before DJ Flower smirked and continued, "But I suppose god would be dead," as he laughed. The Stoner Kidz looked back and forth at each other before they slowly began laughing again. MC Hippy said, "Nietzsche tried, Saitama succeeded!" They all continued to laugh. DJ Flower said, "Yeah and he was holding back!" as they laughed even more hysterically. Suddenly they saw Atlas stir as they looked and DJ Smokey held his finger to his mouth saying, "SHHH! You guys we gotta keep it down! Dogs have really good hearing. Like Saitama punch good hearing!" They all laughed as DJ Smokey continued, "SHHH!" as they continued laughing but quieter. Suddenly Charlie Chimp was on the corner of the screen signing as a monotone computerized dalek-like voice said, "Approaching The Commonwealth of Australia. Prepare for descent." As it went away and the Stoner Kidz strapped themselves into their seats. DJ Smokey turned to Atlas to let him know, only to see he was already pulling off his mask and ear muffs and strapping himself in saying, "I heard. Like you said, we dogs have excellent hearing!" They laughed as the plane began tilting down and descending. DJ Smokey slipped, as he grabbed onto an empty seat, pulled himself in and buckled down, breathing a sigh of relief. The other Stoner Kidz laughed as the plane flew downward, touching down and skiing on the large muddy wetlands of the Outback.
Alfa Ape held a GPS as he led the group. Atlas behind him, the Stoner Kidz behind him. DJ Smokey whispered to MC Hippy “where are we going?”
MC Hippy said, "I dunno man. Why the fuck you askin me?" DJ Smokey was about to respond as Atlas looked back and said, "We are going to King Kangaroo's Boxing Club."
DJ Smokey said “ohhh. AWE!” As he slapped his neck, lifting his hand with the back guts of a mosquito. He freaked out “OH NO! AM I GONNA GET WEST NILE VIRUS?”
MC Hippy laughed saying “dood, does this look like the West Nile?”
DJ Smokey said “I dunno man. Why the fuck you askin me? You’re the one who went to college.”
MC Hippy laughed “yeah I did, and you know what I learned? I learned that the West Nile isn’t in Australia!”
DJ Smokey said “ok, but like still. Am I gonna be ok?”
Atlas said “from just that one I wouldn’t worry too much.”
DJ Smokey smiled saying “oh good. Wait… from just that one? What if there’s another and I get West Nile Virus? Oh no, no, I can’t get”- He is cut off by Alfa Ape reaching back holding him an orange can with green letters reading Mosquito Coast!” DJ Smokey smiled and said “thanx man, ape, you know what I mean.” Alfa Ape nodded and grunted as he continued leading. Soon they came across a large swampy lake-like body. Alfa Ape stopped and Atlas stepped forward and barked.” The Stoner Kidz looked at each other in confusion. Before long green snouts and bodies rise, swimming towards them. DJ Flower crosses himself saying “oh god!” MC Hippy and Bud Buddy got behind him saying “yeah, oh god is right! Help us lord! You’re our only hope!” DJ Flower shook his head saying “what? Oh now you’re prayin?”
MC Hippy and Bud Buddy nod saying, "Yeah, well gods got our back too. Right?"
DJ Flower laughs and says “what? Got your back? No, no, you’re goin to hell for sure!”
Atlas looks back saying, "Oh calm down they're fine. They are our taxies. They run the most successful taxi business in the entire Outback. They probably won't eat you. That would be bad for business." As the crocodiles come up to shore DJ Smokey runs up and hugs one's nose as he blows smoke from his joint into their nostrils and says, "Now don't worry, I'll give you another hit after you get us across. But I want you at your best when driving." MC Hippy yells, "Dood! What are you doing?"
DJ Smokey looked back saying, "What? Atlas said they probably won't eat us!" Atlas rolls his eyes as he gets on the back of one of the crocodiles and DJ Smokey does the same. MC Hippy and Bud Buddy look at each other, shrug and walk onto one themselves. DJ Flower says, "Wait, are you guys for real? These are crocodiles. They're more aggressive than alligators who are themselves damn near the most aggressive animal on the planet…. Hey, hey what are you doing?" As Alfa Ape picks him up and steps one foot on each of two crocodiles, holding DJ Flower in his arms as he crosses himself saying, "Oh lord"—DJ Smokey interrupted, "Don't worry they probably won't eat us!"
DJ Flower screamed “that probably is doing alotta heavy lifting!” As the crocodiles begin swimming.
DJ Smokey pet his crocodile as he spoke to it, "So, you have a girlfriend?" The crocodile just glares and blinks as it continues pushing itself through the murky water. DJ Smokey says, "Yeah, me neither. I kinda have a thing for my buddy Bud Buddy's mom, shh. And my dad's ex. Maybe we could all do a polyamorous thing. I dunno. You ever done the polyamorous thing? What's that like? I don't think DJ Flower condones those, but ya know, he's one a those religious types, and what do they know? Ya know?" The crocodile makes no sound as it just continues propelling itself through the pond with its tail. Everyone else stares at DJ Smokey in bewilderment as he just lays back and hits a joint on the spine of a crocodile. As the crocodiles continue to swim, Atlas lays down, his head near the head of the crocodile, he whispers in its ear, "Animal independence pact. We have a hearing, you could help, if you're interested?" Suddenly the crocodiles stop, they look at each other, to the confusion of the Stoner Kidz and Alfa Ape who look back and forth at each other. Atlas whispers again, "Just think about it." After a moment the crocodiles sway their tails again and continue swimming.
After a while the crocodiles walk up onto a dirt patch surrounded by the swampy pond. Atlas hops off, followed by the Stoner Kidz. DJ Flower still crossing himself as Alfa Ape carries him off. Atlas whispers to the crocodiles “thank you. And, think about what I said.” As he turns around and begins walking. Alfa Ape and the Stoner Kidz follow, except MC Bud Buddy who asks “wait, what about a tip?”
DJ Smokey turns back saying with a laugh “you don’t need a tip.”
MC Bud Buddy stares at him saying “not for me. For them.”
DJ Flower runs saying “I’m not gonna be the tip! I’m not gonna be the tip!”
Atlas rolls his eyes barking “they will be paid on the way back! Now come on!”
DJ Flower says “wait, way back?” As his lip quivers. Everyone ignores his fear.
MC Hippy wonders “how do they make a business like that work? Like how do they assure we pay?”
Alfa Ape signs “they’re the only way on or off this island, so assuming anyone ever leaves, they have to come back.” MC Hippy nods, understanding the sign language after long enough with Alfa Ape. MC Bud Buddy asks “what if we swim?”
Atlas deadpans “then you’re the payment!” The Stoner Kidz laugh and nod except DJ Flower who says “wait what?” His lip still quivering. The rest of the Stoner Kidz laugh louder at their friends' fear. After walking for a bit they reach an intertwined wall of trees and rocks, surrounded by sticks and leaves. Atlas stops by these, as Alfa Ape approaches the rock next to him and knocks on it. A small rock is removed from a spot on it as eyes glare out. Atlas barks “like King Kong, but Kangaroo!” The eyes glance around, as the small rock replaces them and the leaf covered branches in front of him open slowly
Atlas looks and says “oh yeah, that’s Boxer The Boxer! He’s pretty good.”
DJ Smokey says “you gotta bet on him, he’s a fellow dog!”
Atlas shakes his head “no, he’s good, but I don’t bet. And besides he’s up against King Kangaroo. And you never bet against King Kangaroo!” As he and Smokey look up seeing King Kangaroo, hit his gloves together as he hops over to Boxer. Boxer, falls from the ring edge, and slips aside, dodging his punch. DJ Smokey holds his fists u cheering “WOOO!” As he looks over to a vacant counter, puts his hand in his pocket and walks over. He yells to the woman behind the counter “a hundred dollars on the dog!” As he slams a one hundred dollar bill on the counter. The woman, surprised, says nothing, she just takes the bill, puts it in a drawer, takes out a blue stub and hands it to him. Smokey says "thank you ma’am” as he pretends to tip a hat he isn’t wearing, and walks off. He watches Boxer jump and paw at King Kangaroo’s face multiple times at such high speeds, King Kangaroo hops backward. DJ Smokey holds his fists up, holding the light blue stub screaming “WOOOO! C’MON BOXER! YOU GOT”- His cheering stops as his smile fades as King Kangaroo pulls his arm back and thrusts forward, knocking Boxer across the ring, landing on his side, after a whimper. Spiders drop down on webs shaping them into numbers as the crowd counts “ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!” Boxer is still laying there as the crowd cheers, a man in stripes holds up King Kangaroo’s arm and announces “WINNER!” The crowd cheers as people carrying stretchers rush into the ring and put the boxer on it rushing off. King Kangaroo steps down from the ring as a well dressed man smoking a cigar puts a robe on him, pats his shoulder saying that was great! After all these years! You still got it baby woo!” As he squirts some water from a bottle into his mouth. King Kangaroo drinks as he looks over making eye contact with Atlas, he nods, Atlas nods. King Kangaroo walks over to a luxury couch area as Atlas follows along with the rest of his friends. DJ Smokey slumps his head, staring at his tiny blue stub, saying “damn! I thought a boxer was a sure thing in a , ya know, boxing match.” As he drops the stub, it sways to the ground as he looks over and runs after his friends calling “hey wait for me!”
King Kangaroo sits by the suited man on a round couch, with a glass table in the center. The suited man says to a woman in a skimpy dress, "Get us some martinis, will ya sweet heart?" The woman nods as she heads off. The man then turns to Atlas, Alfa Ape standing behind him, the Stoner Kidz beside them. He smiles and says, "So, Atlas, I have heard a lot about you. So tell us, what are you doing here?"
Atlas looks at King Kangaroo then back at the man asking “I’m sorry, who are you?”
The man laughs “I’m Gent, King Kangaroo’s manager. He lacks the vocal chords to communicate and the Hawking like computer that you have, so, I do the talking.”
Atlas barks “you? A human? Speaking for an independent agent like King Kangaroo?”
Gent replies “I am merely a translator. You see we have been together for many years. As such I have learned his tells, I know in a way that you, nor anyone else could ever understand, what he wants to say.”
Atlas growls slightly “I am here about independence. You have taken that from this powerful animal, you”-
Gent interrupts “I have not taken anything. Most human fighters have managers, yet they are independent. King Kangaroo is no different. I am only here to translate, and manage his affairs. So tell us, what are you here for, he can understand you, and I can understand him, so tell us?”
Atlas relents, looks at King Kangaroo and says, "You remember my caretaker Cromag? As it turns out the CTT was not the only treaty he was working on. Another, the AIP, Animals Independence Pact—the first international proposal for full animal liberation." Gent and King Kangaroo look at each other. King Kangaroo blinks a few times through a glare. Gent nods, turns to Atlas and says, "While that does sound exciting, it doesn't really answer our question of why you are here?"
Atlas says to King Kangaroo, "Cromag as you know is dead. He died long before he could ever push this proposal through. However, my new lawyer, Justice"—
DJ Smokey interrupts, raising his hand “that’s my dad, he’s great!” Atlas looks aback and glares at him, along with King Kangaroo and Gent, as MC Hippy nudges him with his elbow. DJ Smokey puts his hand and head down muttering “sorry.”
Atlas looks back at King Kangaroo and continues, "Anyway, Justice, a human lawyer who has come to gain my respect, has been working very hard to push through Cromag's AIP. And he has got us a date to present it to the UN, on the fourth of July. And, well as your Gent here alluded to, my Hawking computer Voice Box and massive globally recognized cannabis business gives me quite a case. Though questions may be raised about other animals' ability to handle independence, which of course you and I know is just humans attempting to merely justify their unjustifiable actions." Gent nods in agreement, as Atlas continues, "And although I know you like to stay under the radar, and I respect and understand that—but this, this is for all of us, and if they could see you the way they see me, our case becomes strengthened. So I am here to ask you, the same as I asked of the crocodiles, just think about it, please! I know humans have attempted to trap us before, and if you were coming to me right now, I would be having that same thought, but I also know you, just as you know me, so you do not have to trust them, only me." Gent stares at King Kangaroo as he blinks. Gent nods, turns back to Atlas and says, "Alright, we cannot give you an answer right away. But out of respect for you, we will consider it." Atlas says, "Thank you!" as he raises his paw; King Kangaroo slaps it, as Atlas puts it down and turns to walk away. Alfa Ape and the Stoner Kidz follow wondering, "Was that it? Wait what are"—Alfa Ape signals them to stop and they do. As Atlas is about to walk out the door he turns as he hears Gent calling, "Atlas, Atlas." As he stops running, he takes a deep breath and continues, "Look I agree with you. And I have some experience with the law, so I know how helpful King Kangaroo's testimony could be. Though he is skeptical, he trusts you, and I do too, so I will try to convince him. I can't make any promises; I do not control him. But I will advise him with what I think is best, the way any good manager would. And I just want you to know that ok," as he holds out his hand. Atlas glares for a moment before raising his paw and slapping his hand with his own kind of smile saying, "Thank you Gent. I am glad my friend has a representative like you." As he turns and walks out followed by Alfa Ape and the Stoner Kidz.
As they enter the plane, Atlas stops and wonders “what day is it?” The Stoner Kidz, Alfa Ape and Charlie Chimp look at him in confusion. MC Hippy says “Wendsday why?”
Atlas asks Charlie Chimp “can you get us to India in a day?”
Charlie Chimp nods and signs, "I'll get us there," as he hops off to the cockpit. Moments later the plane takes off. MC Hippy asks, "Why do we need to get there in a day?"
Atlas says, "Thursday is when the Monkey Street Performers Union has their meeting. And if I can convince Monty the Monkey to let us plead our case, I think I can get them on board." The Stoner Kidz nod, still confused as the plane soars upward and accelerates forward. Suddenly a robotic voice speaks as the TV shows Charlie Chimp signing, "Approaching the port of India. Prepare for descent." As the Stoner Kidz, Alfa Ape, and Atlas awake, and walk to and strap themselves into their chairs, as the plane swerves downward, landing and skiing on the water up to a large spot next to an open dock. They all walk down the back slope of the plane past the docks of the port onto a dirt city street block. They all look around in awe. DJ Smokey says, "Wow I've never been to India before," as he folds his hands and bows at a local woman walking by, "Namaste." She looks at him very confused, and perhaps a little offended. The Stoner Kidz laugh. MC Hippy says, "That's Japan."
DJ Smokey responds, "How would you know? You failed Geology." The Stoner Kidz continued laughing hysterically as MC Hippy continues, "Ok, no, first of all, I failed Statistics, got a D in geology. And, second of all, what you're talking about is Geography, which I came out with a solid C in, so." As he nods DJ Smokey shrugs saying, "They all seem the same to me." The Stoner Kidz crack up more and more. They even stop walking to slap their knees they are laughing so hard. MC Hippy says, "Ok but regardless of how they seem to you, they are not the same. Geology is the study of rocks and shit. Geography is the study of places." DJ Smokey says, "Pretty sure that's nouns." MC Hippy is dumbfounded as he just stares on in bewilderment at the ignorance of DJ Smokey as the rest of their friends just keep slapping their knees laughing hysterically.
Atlas listening to this annoyance, rolls his eyes as they land on a monkey in a red silk vest, wearing a fez, clapping thimbles together as he dances to music, "Hey, hey, we're the monkeys, and people say we monkey around," as bystanders clap and drop bills into a small case in front of the dancing monkey. Atlas looks back and yells to the still laughing Stoner Kidz, "Hey, guys stop," as they all look up, "Huh?" as they walk to Atlas watching the monkey. DJ Smokey starts smiling and clapping with the rest of the audience as the rest of his friends join him. Atlas just stares on, Alfa Ape beside him. When the song ends the monkey squeaks and tips his hat to the bystanders, as he puts his thimbles in the case above the money, closes it, slips it on his tail and runs off. Atlas runs after him followed by Alfa Ape and the Stoner Kidz. They follow the monkey into a mostly abandoned open warehouse area where monkeys of all kinds hoot, and squeak, and climb and run. Atlas looks around wondering aloud, "Where is Monty?" Suddenly a monkey lowers from their tail behind him holding a phone that asks, "Who wants to know?" Atlas turns around in shock as Monty smiles, squeaks and types quickly on his phone, "ATLAS! My old friend. How are you?" as he jumps on and around Atlas's back. Atlas actually smiles as he says, "Hello Monty, it's good to see you."
Monty types frantically “always good to see you. What are you doin here?”
Atlas says “well I remember this is when your union meets and I have a proposal I think you all might be interested in.”
Monty types “well, then let’s get you talkin, come, come on.” As he pulls Atlas's ears and points towards a stage. Once on the stage, Monty hooks a wire into his phones headphone jack and types “hey all, gonna start a little early today. An old friend of mine has a proposal. Full disclosure he is a dog, but he’s one of the good ones. He rarely eats monkeys.” The monkeys squeak in laughter as Monty ushers Atlas to center stage. Atlas projects his vice saying “hello Monkey street Performers Union. My name is Atlas. As an entrepreneur myself I very much respect what you all have built here. The humans saw you as a problem for so long, then you provided them with entertainment and they accepted you. That is amazing truly. But, well every where else in the world, that is far far less common. And that's what I am here about. See I have a date with The UN, on this fourth of July, to present my case for Animal Independence. In the hopes of carving out what you have here, everywhere. And well, I would hope this could be our case, not just mine, it affects us all after all. I do not expect an answer right away, all I ask is that you consider it. Maybe together we can give all the other animals what you and I take for granted. Thank you.”
DJ Smokey walks out and says “nomasta” as he folds his hands and bows Atlas pushes him back rolling his eyes.
DJ Smokey says, "I know, but like just a secondary"—He is cut off by the rest of the Stoner Kidz shushing him. He slumps his head muttering, "Sorry, I just wanna party in Cabo, is that such a crime?" As the plane soars upward, knocking an unsecured DJ Smokey to the floor, "WHOA!" he says as the rest of the already seated Stoner Kidz laugh at him, he glares at them, before laughing himself.
The plane lands on a large ocean body far from the shore. The Stoner Kidz looking out the window wonder "How we gonna get"—As a fan sound cuts them off, they look to see Alfa Ape driving a hovercraft down the way, as the back of the plane opens, Atlas hops on as he barks to the Stoner Kidz, "You comin?" The Stoner Kidz rush to hop on the hovercraft as it drives out right onto the water and towards the shore. Once the shore is in view Alfa Ape speeds up, swooshing right onto the land as he keeps driving. The Stoner Kidz passing a joint between them wave at shocked girls in bikinis as MC Hippy says, "We probably just look like blurs to them." DJ Smokey says, "Yeah, but like blurs they kinda wanna get to know and maybe go home with right?" MC Hippy laughs as DJ Smokey asks, "Right? Right?" as the rest of the Stoner Kidz join the laughter. DJ Smokey still wondering, "Right?"
Dirt flies up as the hovercraft slows down in an out of the way desert road. The yellow sun beats down, heat rises from the rocks, right outside a large foggy white green house. Alfa Ape stops the hovercraft. Alfa Ape steps off followed by Atlas and the Stoner Kidz. They walk up to the green house. By the door two slots, one large reading PACKAGES above it and the other thin reading LETTERS above it. Alfa Ape presses a button on the black handle of the thin door and pulls it open, Atlas and the Stoner Kidz. inside was like a bustling mail room, chirps, squeaks, a few caws and yells. A conveyor belt running with envelopes and boxes, as crows pick through them, sorting and separating them onto separate conveyor belts. The legs of Pigeons being tied with envelopes as Harnesses of boxes being loaded on to California Condors. As they fly out of a vent on the roof. A large tree centered in the back, a green, blueish, red parrot perched on a branch, claws wrapped tightly around the branch as he looks over a piece of paper hanging from another. Atlas and Alfa Ape walk straight towards him as the Stoner Kidz follow slowly, staring all around in awe. Atlas barks up at the parrot as the bird looks up and around frightened. Then he looks down and squeaks “oh Atlas you frightened me.”
“How are you Peepers?”
Peepers replies, in his high pitch squeak “I am quite alright. And you? My old friend.”
Atlas says “I am doing well. Do you have a minute?"
Peepers says “for you? Of course. It has been so long.” As he flies down, landing on Atlas’s head and continuing “so tell me, what brings you all the way out here?”
Atlas says “freedom!”
Peepers squeaks in confusion “what do you mean?”
Atlas explains “the Animals Independence Pact. A proposal drawn up by my late caretaker, Cromag”-
Peepers bows his beak saying “rest in peace!”
Atlas nods “thank you. Anyway, he drew this up before he passed. I only recently found out about it. Because of a new lawyer friend”-
DJ Smokey interrupts “ohhh, you consider my dad a friend? That’s so sweet. I’m sure he feels the same.” As he holds both his hands over his heart. Peepers and Atlas stare at him.
Atlas says “ignore him. Anyway, my new lawyer friend arranged a hearing with the UN coming up this fourth of July.”
Peepers says “fitting.”
“That’s what I said” Atlas replied.
Peepers continues “but I do not understand what you need from me?”
Atlas replied “all I need from you is to consider testifying. The more animal entrepreneurs we have the better our chances.”
Peepers ponders this, asking “have you talked to King?”
Atlas nodded “as well as the crocs, and the monkeys in India.”
“And Charlotte?"
Atlas shakes his head “no, I promised Charlie to leave her out of it.”
Peepers nods saying “I understand, but I can't imagine anyone better to make the case.”
Atlas nods “sure, but I can’t. Like I said I promised”-
Peepers interrupts “yes, yes, you promised your friend. I have always admired your honesty. Even when it may hurt you. But, well to answer your question, I will consider this, but I must say. I do have my skepticism. I mean, my business caters to humans. They love my service. But, you know how they are, they never want to see how the sausage is made.”
Atlas nods, but before he can speak DJ Smokey says “mmmm, sausage” as he rubs his stomach and licks his lips. Atlas and Peepers stare at him. Peepers asks “so these are your friends?” Atlas says “yes. They have shown themselves to be very supportive and helpful, despite their clear intelligence deficit.” Peepers and Atlas laugh. As MC Hippy stares on in bewilderment. Finally he asks “so you can talk?”
Peppers looks at him “of course, you can hear me right?”
MC Hippy nods saying “yeah, but like how?”
Peepers says "over my many years I have heard so much talk, that I learned the words necessary to communicate.”
MC Hippy asks “but like are you actually talking or just mimicking?” DJ Smokey nudges him muttering “dood, don’t be a dick. He’s being really nice.”
MC Hippy responds “I don’t mean to be a dick I’m just curious. Like I know parrots can mimic but talk?”
Atlas looking angry about to bark before a squeaking Peepers laughs “it is alright. If I come to your hearing this will no doubt be a question that will arise. So I will answer your question with another question, what is it that you do?”
MC Hippy, confused, says “I, talk.”
Peepers says “oh? How?”
MC Hippy says “well I was taught over the years and learned from my parents and teachers and just kind of began to understand.”
“Ah, so you did what I did. How then is what you do not mere mimicry? Just as I, you heard sounds, associated them with meaning, then learned how and when to make them. Just as I did.” MC Hippys taps his chin pondering as DJ Smokey makes a mind blown motion with his hands saying “WHOA! BOOM! Is all language mere mimicry?"
MC Hippy nudges DJ Smokey and says “no of course not, it’s, it’s, well it’s, Like language is”- His thought keeps from being able to fully explain as DJ Smokey smirks, leans to his ear and whispers slowly “mimicry!” They all laugh. As Atlas says “ok, well thank you Peepers for hearing me out.”
“Of course, Atlas, anything for my old friend, ah and for my new friends” He flutters over to a bag on a branch of the tree, grabs a thin card out of it with his beak and flies back, landing on Alfa Apes shoulder. Alfa Ape takes the card and looks at it with a puzzled expression. Peepers says “that’s a prepaid mastercard, should be at least a grand on there. Enjoy Cabo, my old and new friends.”
Atlas says “that’s very kind but we can’t”-
DJ Smokey grabs the card and interrupts “of course we can! I mean, partyin in Cabo, that’s the dream man, dog.” Peepers looks at Atlas as he flies over to him “you work too hard my friend. Why don’t you take a night, and live the dream?” Atlas thinks for a moment before he relents and DJ Smokey, immediately noticing his dropping posture throws his hands up saying “WOOOO! TIME TO PARTY IN CABO!” As he runs out of the green house, before coming right back and saying “oh thanx Peepers, you’re the best.” Peepers nods and DJ Smokey continues “WOOOOOO!” Running out again, followed by the Stoner Kidz, and Alfa Ape, Atlas, hesitantly behind.
They all walk into a large resort lobby. Eyes on them. Gasps and stares, whispers and laughs, as they walk to the desk. DJ Smokey says “a suite.”
The clerk stares at him, and then glances at the animals behind him. Then back at him and says “um, we don’t allow animals at the hotel.” DJ Smokey looks around in shock saying “really? Then what are these animals doin in here? He then says “hey, y’all gotta go, they don’t allow animals at this hotel.” He actually starts walking over to people and ushering them up saying “c’mon, c’mon, you heard the lady. No animals.” He then looks at the clerk and says “that means you too. C’mon, c’mon!” As he waves her over. She stands behind the desk confused as the Stoner Kidz laugh. DJ Smokey says “she did say no animals right?” The Stoner Kidz nod. The clerk says “yeah no animals.”
MC Hippy jumps in “yeah so you should leave then right? Unless, you’re being inconsistent and not including Homo Sapien Sapiens when you say animal, but I’m pretty sure”- As he takes out his phone and does a search, then continues,“yup, they are in the Kingdom Animalia, see” as he holds his screen to the clerk showing her a graphic.
The clerk rolls her eyes “you know what I mean.”
MC Hippy responds “I know what the science says. Do you? Or do you just not care?”
“I don’t care! These are our”-
DJ Smokey interrupts “bigots gonna bigot! Cmon, let’s go tell all our millions of college aged followers about how bigoted this hotel is.” The Stoner Kidz nod as they head out. The clerk suddenly becomes concerned saying “wait no, it’s not bigotry we just”-
DJ Smokey says “I don’t know what else to call it you wanna refuse service to someone cause they look different than you.”
The clerk shakes her head “no, it’s cause they’re dirty they”-
The Stoner Kidz simultaneously yell “HOA! They’re dirty, I’ve never heard a bigot use that one before.”
DJ Flower holds up his phone saying “yeah let’s see if any of our followers have.”
The clerk continues “no, but like, they track dirt, and carry germs, and can get sick, or relieve themselves all over the floor.”
MC Hippy squints in confusion “and humans don’t?”
The clerk shakes her head “no, we use the bathroom.”
“Oh, so it’s the bathroom use, ok some consistency, unless, I dunno there was a baby in here or something.” MC Hippy says as he looks around and sees a lady holding a baby and continues “oh what’s this? Hey lady, this clerk doesn’t like your kind around these parts.”
Atlas finally steps up to MC Hippy saying “I appreciate this but it’s ok, we can”-
MC Hippy says “no, it’s not! Inconsistent, anti-scientific, bigoted rules are not ok, they’ve never been ok, and the people have to know about the business that enforces them. So keep recording Flower.” DJ Flower gives him a thumbs up as he holds his phone.
The lady behind the desk, rolled her eyes, annoyed and wanting this to be over she finally relented and said “look, I can let them be here outside and stuff, just not in a room, ok? I can’t do anything else. I don’t make the rules.” The Stoner Kidz still looked annoyed as Atlas said “thanx ma’am, that is fine.” As he looked at the Stoner Kidz and said “don’t push any further. She will get fired if she compromises anymore. Besides, hopefully this won’t matter after the fourth.”
“But it matters now” DJ Smokey said.
“It does, but that is why we are here. We have waited hundreds of years for independence, we can wait a few more days.” Atlas replied as the Stoner Kidz hung their heads and nodded.”
Atlas said “now go have fun” as he smiled in his way.
Atlas laid by a hot tub as Alfa Ape stood by him. They watched the Stoner Kidz hold up drinks at the bar as they cheered “WOOOOO!” Behind the blaring party music. Girls in bikinis surrounded them cheering and laughing. DJ Smokey hit a joint before locking lips with a girl and exhaling in her mouth. She then turned to her friend, they locked lips and she exhaled in her mouth. The Stoner Kidz smiled big and cheered “WHOA!” As the girls laughed. One of them took the joint from DJ Smokey, said “now it’s your turn!” DJ Smokey smiled as she took a hit, locked lips with DJ Smokey and exhaled in his mouth, he breathed in as the girl whispered again “now it’s your turn.” DJ Smokey’s smile faded as he and the Stoner Kidz looked at each other awkwardly, the girls laughed as DJ Smokey’s friends backed away. DJ Smokey looked at the smiling girls waved him to his friends. He looked back and forth at them awkwardly, shrugged, grabbed DJ Flower, pulled his head to his, locked lips with him and exhaled in his mouth as DJ Fower’s eyes widened and he struggled to pull away. As DJ Smokey let go, DJ Flower blew out, wiped his tough off, and crossed himself as DJ Smokey said “you know you’re actually a pretty good kisser.” Everyone laughed and cheered except DJ Flower, who shoved him and said “shut up man, god!” As he wiped his tough off some more.
DJ Smokey laughed and said “I thought you didn’t hate gay people?”
DJ Flower said “oh is that you comin out?”
DJ Smokey said “well I dunno like I said you’re a pretty good kisser, you may have just awoken something in me.” As he put his arm around him and pulled him in, giving him a noogie.
DJ Flower pulled away saying “shut up man god!” As they all laughed. Atlas and Alfa Ape watched all of this. Alfa Ape turns to Atlas and signs “looks like they're havin fun.” Atlas nodded. Alfa Ape signed “I’m gonna go back to the plane, you comin?” Atlas shook his head saying “no, I’m not tired, you have a good night though.” Alfa Ape nodded as he headed out. Atlas stared at the Stoner Kidz, laughing, cheering, drinking and smoking. He said sadly “glad you guys are having fun!” he said quietly to himself.
“Our friends buddy. And they’re asleep.” DJ Smokey says as he holds in the smoke.
Atlas says “and you?”
DJ Smokey exhales “I don’t sleep!” Atlas chuckles as DJ Smokey continues “I’m serious. No one believes me, and no one knows why, but I don’t sleep.”
Atlas says “you must be a medical anomalie." With a laugh.
DJ Smokey says “that’s what the doctors said after my sleep studies. I’ve had a great many done, up the whole time, the doctors mind boggled. But I just don’t sleep.”
Atlas shakes his head “that’s not possible.”
DJ Smokey took a hit, inhaled and said “yeah, they said that too, but possible or not, I don’t.”
Atlas asked “never?”
DJ Smokey shook his head as he inhaled saying "maybe when I was a baby or something, I dunno, but not as long as I can remember.” Atlas looked shocked, as he laid his head down. After a moment DJ Smokey turned to him and asked “hey, what’s it like?”
Atlas looked up, confused “what?”
“Sleep. I’ve heard dreams are kinda fun. Do you dream? What is it like to sleep? To dream? To wake up?”
Atlas said "I dunno, it’s hard to explain. But yeah I dream, sometimes I dream of running in fields, Cromag found that annoying as I would constantly wake him up, kicking my legs against the wall.” They laughed.
DJ Smokey said “sounds fun. It’s like, here you don’t get to be free, but in there, you do, you can finally run free. They can’t take that from you.”
Atlas nods as he says “yeah, it is nice.” He then starts to sing softly “it’s hard to say that I’d rather stay awake when I’m asleep” DJ Smokey joins in as they sing together “because my dreams are bursting at the seams!”
The next morning the Stoner Kidz yawned as they followed Atlas onto the plane. Except DJ Smokey, awake as ever running past the rest of his friends patting them on the back screaming “LET’S GO GET SOME FREEDOM! THEN WE CAN REALLY PARTY HUH?” His friends yawned and rubbed their eyes, as they waved at him saying “yeah, yeah, sounds good!” as they shuffled their way onto the plane. Most of them dozed off as it took off. Except DJ Smokey of course who flipped the TV saying “oh yeah, One Punch Man! Hell yeah! Atlas, wanna watch Saitama kick some ass?” Atlas rolled his eyes as he circled around on his bed and faced the TV saying “sure.”
DJ Smokey pressed play saying ‘hell yeah! You know he could really help with the independence fight. Anyone tried denying it he’d just punch ‘em!” As he made a punch motion and laughed. Atlas laughed and said “oh if only it were that easy.”
DJ Smokey shook his head saying “it doesn’t matter how easy it is, in the end, just like everybody else, they're still goin down in just one punch!” Atlas smiled as DJ Smokey continued “that’s my dad, I mean. The lawyer so good he’ll take down any opposing argument in just one punch, I’ve seen him do it! So don’t worry, the One Punch Man of law’s got this!”
Atlas smiled, saying “I hope you’re right!”
DJ Smoeky shoveled a handful of popcorn in his mouth as he said “you’ll see, then you won’t have to hope, cause you’ll know.” As he pointed at the screen and laughed, punching the air, chewed kernels falling out of his grinning mouth.
The Stoner Kidz woke up as their ears started to pop, as the plane began descending. DJ Flower got up and looked out a round window. Pointing he said “who’s that?” The other Stoner Kidz ran to the windows, each looking out one. MC Bud Buddy said “I think that’s Smokey’s dad.”
“Yeah, and the one chick hotter than your mom.” MC Hippy added with a laugh.
MC Bud Buddy looked at him and shoved him, he shoved back and they both laughed before returning to squishing their faces against the window. MC Bud Buddy said “but yeah that’s definitely Justice and Debby Downer.”
DJ Smokey said “no way what? As he got up and ran to a window and pushed his face against it.
DJ Flower said “what’do you think they’re doin here?”
DJ Smokey replied, shaking his head “I dunno, but they’re together so it can’t be good.” Atlas became concerned as he got up and waited by the back. When the plane landed, the back opened and Atlas immediately ran out. As Debby and Justice stepped off a hovercraft Atlas said “what are you doing here Justice? Is everything ok?”
Justice hung his head, shaking it. As Debby spoke “I saw something and took it to Justice, he said we had to come here right away, here look.” As she held out a tablet and a video began playing. The video opened with grassy fields where cows roamed and soft, sad, sympathetic commercial music played in the background. An elderly farmer stood on an old wooden fence saying “this is how me and my family have always treated our cows. We raise them right so that we can feed you right. These accusations that we mistreat them” Right on cue the farmer teared up as he removed his hat and held it to his heart “it breaks my heart.” The screen switched to a black farmer shoveling hay saying “they compare them to slaves. Well I know somethin about slavery in this country. My dad and grand dad used to tell me stories passed down from real slaves. And when they were freed, they got this land, still in my family today. These animals aren’t slaves, but they sure helped ‘em. And I can't understand why anyone would wish to see that end!” As the farmer almost cried as he turned away from the camera and continued shoveling hay. After a moment the camera panned over slowly to the side of the barn, a big sign plastered PETERSON PET FOOD! As a man in a suit stood by it, looking and pointing up. Before looking down, shaking his head saying “Hi, I’m Prez Leed, president of the International Animal Husbandry Union. We support many small farms like this one. And when we heard the slander that was goin around about our farmers, well I just had to come out here myself and offer my support. You see this Animal Independence Pact is nothing but an excuse to hurt small farmers by a corporate giant. Only difference is this time, it’s a corporate giant breed dog. A Great Dane, who no doubt eats food made from a farmer just like this one. He claims to want animal independence. But does he really?” Prez shook his head and continued “If this dog got what he wanted, not only would farms like this be outta business, but he himself would be outta food.” As he walked the scene transitioned into a white lab like office where Prez stood by a woman in a white lab coat and glasses, holding a beaker. He said “this is our leading veterinarian expert. She has helped numerous sick animals all over the world. She has saved them so that they could produce the very supply of food our titan of industry relies on. Doctor Orvul, please tell the viewers what you were telling me.” As he looked at her and motioned to the camera. She looked at the Camera and began “of course. So dogs are obligate carnivores”- DJ Smokey shook his head “that’s not true.” The group shushed him he said “but it’s not ture. She’s a vet, she must know that’s not true, she’s lying.” They shushed him again, and he relented, slumping his head back to the video where Doctor Orvul spoke “that means they can only digest meat. Which means they can’t survive without eating meat.” Prez asked “and the only way to get meat is to kill certain animals, correct?” Doctor Orvul nodded, as Prez continued “there you have it folks. This great dane claims to want Animal Independence, but how can we trust that? If he is ok with certain animals being killed for his survival?” Prez shook his head saying “no. What he really wants is control, power. This Animal Independence Pact would allow him to easily expand into the agriculture market, where he could easily maintain his own supply of dead animals, while dooming your pets.” He wiped his eyes and sniffled slightly as he said “I’m sorry, it just breaks my heart the lengths some people, or in this case, dogs will go for power.” The commercial ended as DJ Smokey said “gimme that” grabbed the tablet and scrolled below the video typing in all caps SHE’S A GOD DAMN LIER! DOGS ARE NOT OBLIGATE CARNIVERS! WOLVES MAYBE, BUT DOGS CAN DIGEST CERTAIN STARCHES AND GRAINS! IT IS RIGHT ABOUT ONE THING THOUGH, THE LENGTHS SOME PEOPLE WILL GO FOR POWER IS DISGUSTING!
Atlas did not say a word he just walked back into the plane. Justice hollered “Atlas, atlas, you know I’m still gonna help you right? We can fight this.”
Debby jumped in, "Yeah, that's why I came, I studied Veterinary Medicine and as DJ Smokey pointed out, she was lying, I know dogs are not obligate carnivores. I"—DJ Smokey blushed and smiled saying, "I am smurt!" MC Hippy nudged him, shaking his head. Atlas still silent until he ran into Charlie Chimp coming down from the cockpit. He smiled and signed, "Hey Atlas, everything ok?"
Atlas replied “how soon can we get back in the air?”
Charlie Chimp looked confused as he said “well soon, but we have a few days to make it to New York, so”-
Atlas interrupted “we need to go soon. As soon as possible”-
Charlie Chimp interrupted, still confused “well ok, but like I said we have a day or so before we need to leave to New York, so”-
Atlas interrupted, “we need to stop in Newark first.” Charlie Chimp’s face became a concerned frown. Behind them DJ Smokey said “but he just said we have plenty a time to make it to New York.”
MC Hippy nudged him saying “shh, not New York, Newark, in New Jersey.”
DJ Smokey laughed saying “what? But the UN building is in New York.”
MC Hippy said “yes, but Newark is in New Jersey.”
“Wait, what? Newark isn’t New York? Isn’t that just how people in New York say New York?” The Stoner Kidz face palm and shake their heads. DJ Smokey says “what? Newark is a town in New Jersey? Not just how New York sounds with a New York accent?” But”- The Stoner Kidz shush him as Charlie Chimp continues “why would we need to go”-
Atlas interrupted “you know why.”
Charlie shook his head saying “you, but you promised.”
“I know and I’m sorry. But I’m out of options. I need to talk to Charlotte, she’s our only hope. Please understand I don’t have anyother”-
Charlie Chimp interrupted, frantically signing “no, no, you promised, you promised that you would leave my sister out of this! She worked so hard to get where she is and you could destroy that, you can’t”-
“I MUST” Atlas screamed. Charlie hung his head, shaking it as Atlas continued “I”m sorry, but I don’t have another option. I thought we could do this with out her, but I no longer believe we can, so”-
Charlie Chimp glared up, angrily screaming “NO! NO! I WILL NOT LET YOU INVOLVE HER!”
Atlas matched his tone saying “then I will find another pilot and you can find another job!”
Charlie Chimp's lip quivered, his face saddened and hurt, as he hung his head, nearly whimpering saying, "Fine then, I can have us in the air in fifteen minutes," as he hopped and cried back up to the cockpit.
Charlotte Chimp laughed and smiled asking “and you are?”
DJ Smokey said “oh yeah, sorry, I’m DJ Smokey, this is DJ Flower, he’s very religious but only a little bit homophobic” DJ Flower nudged him as he continued “this is MC Hippy, he went to college, but he failed logistics, or statistics, or linguistics, I dunno one a those ics, which are apparently different, who knew? Anyway , this is MC Bud Buddy, his mom is super hot. I probably have a picture here somewhere”- As he dug around in his pocket his dad leaned in and said “son, I don’t think that's important right now.”
DJ Smokey replied “right, thanx dad. So yeah that's my dad, the greatest lawyer of all time, except maybe Cromag, or Matt Merdock, but who knows they never got the chance to law off. And then the lovely Debby Downer, who runs a pet shop, studied vet stuff, and is just as hot if not hotter than MC Bud Buddy’s mom.” Everyone rolled their eyes as Debby laughed and DJ Smokey continued “Again I should have a picture. But um, I thought that was the only voice box?”
Charlotte laughed saying “yeah, well Atlas gave me the design specs and it took a long time but some of my researchers were able to crack it. They continue to work on it, unfortunately, it’s really expensive, gonna be a while before we can mass produce them for other animals.”
Atlas said “well I am glad they figured it out for you.”
“Oh thank you Atlas. Now, um as good as it is to see you, it has been so long, I have to assume, you didn't come all this way for pleasure?”
Atlas said “while it is always a pleasure to see you, unfortunately I do have business”-
Charlie Chimp hopped forward interrupting “I’m so sorry Charolette, I made him promise he wouldn't involve you, but he broke his promise, I”-
Charlotte interrupted “whoa, whoa, calm down what promise? What’s going on?”
Atlas spoke before Charlie Chimp could “You remember Cromag?” Charlotte nodded as Atlas continued “well before he died, he apparently had written out another treaty, the AIP, or Animals Independence Pact. He planned to propose this to the UN like he did the CTT. But died befoe he could. I wasn't even aware of it until Justice here found it at the 420 year round clubhouse. Now he has a meeting set in only a few days time at the UN building in New York”-
DJ Smokey interrupted, pointing his finger in the air saying, "Which fun fact is different than Newark." Everyone looked at him.
MC Hippy nudged him saying “dood, she knows that, she lives in Newark.”
“Right, sorry” DJ Smokey says as he puts his finger down and bows his head.
Atlas looks back at Charlotte and continues "anyway. Your brother made me promise I wouldn't involve you. But the International Animal Husbandry Union forced my hand”-
Charlie Chimp glared at him saying, "Yeah, that's your excuse, you didn't want to but you had no choice, blah, blah, blah"—
Atlas interrupted “what would you have me do?”
“Oh I don’t know, maybe keep your fucking promises!”
“I tried but this”-
“Yeha yeah this is bigger than all of us, blah blah”-
“IT IS!” Atlas screamed.
Charlotte then yelled louder, echoing across the warehouse, "ENOUGH!" They all looked at her as she stared down at Charlie and shook her head saying, "You made him promise to leave me out of it? Why?"
Charlie Chimp said "because you worked so hard and I couldn’t let him destroy everything you built.”
Charlotte said “you mean you couldn’t let me make my own choices. Because you already knew the choice I would make?
Charlie Chimp shook his head saying ‘no sister, I”-
Charlotte interrupted “you knew I would choose to risk it all for independence for us all, and you decided that wasn’t worth it for me.” She shook her head “I can’t believe you would do that.”
Charlie said “no, I was”-
Charlotte interrupted again “no, i don’t want to talk to you right now. Go away.” Charlie wanted to say something, but just slumped his head and shuffled off, outside the warehouse. Charlotte then turned to Atlas and said “ok what can I do?”
The day finally came, the fourth of July. Only this fourth of July people from all around the United States put away the fireworks and picked up cameras and picket signs to travel to the UN building In New York City New York. Outside protesters on both sides screamed at each other as a news woman stood in the center talking into a microphone and camera saying "today is our Independence Day, but soon, it might be more than just our independence day. As what some are saying is a long time coming, a proposal known as the Animals Independence Pact, is being presented to the heads of state of over three hundred countries. Soon”- She was interrupted with louder screams as Atlas began walking through surrounded by Alfa Ape and Charlotte Chimp, as well as Justice, Debby Downer, and the Stoner Kidz. The news reporter ran to them saying “oh my god that’s the dog himself. Atlas, Atlas, is there anything you’d like to say”- Atlas just kept walking as Alfa Ape softly cleared the way for them. Finally quieting down when they got inside. But only for a minute. As after mere moments a gavel went down and a voice from a high up chair called “Mister Justice Esquire, you have a case to make?”
Justice stood up saying “yes. Thank you. I am sure you have all had the chance to read the proposed Animals Independence Pact. And I know it may seem radical. But so did the founding fathers of this country and many others. Independence always sounds radical at first. But I think if we get past the radical sounding nature of the proposal we realize, the actual essence of it is no more radical than requesting the rights of a demographic be recognized”-
“The rights of a demographic that itself does not recognize rights” Prez interrupted from across the way. “This proposal is radical, and don’t let this appeal to history fool you. This proposal actively strips away the rights of demographics, while granting rights to a hypocritical bunch. As I have shown in my commercial, That dog must eat meat to survive. Are we supposed to believe he is advocating for his own death? No, thus, he must intend to still kill animals as he has been this whole time. As dogs are obligate carnivores. Isn’t that right Doctor Orvul?” Before Doctor Orvul can speak Debby screams “no that is not right. Any vet would know that dogs are capable of digesting many starches and grains.”
Doctor Orvul clears her throat and says “while yes, that is technically true”-
Justice interrupts “so you admit you lied in that commercial?”
“No, I was merely stating that”-
“You just admitted that dogs can digest starches and grains meaning they are not obligate carnivores. Meaning you said something you knew wasn't true.”
Doctor Orvul nervously clears her throat “yes, but my intent was not to deceive, it”-
Justice interrupted again “was your intent not to make people believe that dogs are obligate carnivores?”
Doctor Orvul shook her head “no, my intent was to say that dogs are going to have a difficult time surviving without meat, if it would even be possible at all.”
Charlotte Chimp jumped in saying “but the production of meat no longer requires the slaughtering of animals.” Everyone looks at her like she is insane as Alfa Ape wheels in a crate full of steaks and burgers. Charlotte motions at it and says “you are all free to try these, they are fully cooked, no kill meat, grown in my laboratory. Many of the protesters outside are eating them as we speak, enjoying them very much, even the ones on the side of the IAHU.”
Prez laughs and says, "It is irrelevant. Look, the fact is that while what these two animals have managed to do is very impressive, the vast, vast, vast majority of animals are not nearly as capable. And to grant rights to an entire demographic that we know does not even understand the concept of rights, is well, frankly absurd." Suddenly commotion from outside begins to leak in as the lady in the high chair yells, "What is going on out there?" Someone runs in and turns on a TV in the room; on the screen outside people gasp and scream as they back up to make way for a row of crocodiles walking through the crowd followed by a Kangaroo in boxing gloves and a man in a suit yelling, "KING KANGAROO MY CLIENT IS AS INDEPENDENT AS ANY ATHLETE! AND ANYONE WHO WANTS TO CHALLENGE THAT HE'LL SEE YOU IN THE RING!" As King Kangaroo punches his gloves together, as a parrot lands on his shoulder saying, "And all language is mere mimicry. WE'RE ALL A BUNCH A PARROTS!" As monkeys began hooting and swinging in on lampposts. As the bystanders stare at the large double doors into the room, men in suits stand in the way, until the crocodiles hiss at them and they dive out of it. Soon the UN main hall is filled with animals of all kinds, standing and staring, glaring and waiting as chants from outside can be heard, "WE'RE ALL PARROTS! WE'RE ALL PARROTS! WE'RE ALL PARROTS!" Atlas smiles, as the Stoner Kidz high five. Prez sits down and the lady in the high chair says, "Ok, we need to discuss. We will have a decision for you shortly," as she hits a gavel and all the delegates get up!
THE END!!!
